where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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