She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Randomize
