so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
