Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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