STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
