There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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