Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
