yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
