have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
