don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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