I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize