Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
You can't motorboat a personality
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
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