my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
