dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
