it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
