is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
