Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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