In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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