Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
