your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
You made out with two different species that night
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Randomize
