we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
