I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
