Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
