Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
