what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
