Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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