I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
