It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
