Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
