he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
sarcasm needs its own font
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
