Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
