he wants to bone in the snuggie
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
