is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
