I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
