i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
