the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize