Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize