Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
