is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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