worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
