ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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