I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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