i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
