So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
