I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
They have beer where we have blood.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
