I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
