Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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