Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
id be glad to
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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