come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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