i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
