I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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